I want to tell my classmate. I have a lot of friends in this class whose have different characteristics. And I want to describe on of them. Well, his name is Muhammad Hagi Firdaus. You can call him Hagi or Mr. H. He is twenty years old. He lives in South Bekasi, exactly at Pekayon Jaya. He has two sisters. He is very tall. He is wearing eye glasses. I think he is clever. He seldom comes late to the class. He usually answers teacher's questions when the teacher give us questions. And then, his hobby is playing bass and guitar. He likes Kurt Cobain. That's all about my classmate in this class.
Note:
___: Topic Sentence.
ppp: Topic
: Controlling Idea
Nice picture, but when u describe about Hagi, try to display his picture too:-). Well, em still wondering about ur topic sentence. The rest of sentences talk about Hagi, yet ur topic sentence is too general and talks about friends and characteristics. What do u think?
BalasHapusThe description is basically clear enough; however, u still have to pay a heed on how to deal with preposition, the use of conjunction, and use more varied sentences. All in all, the grammar is already good.
Thanks Mom Vika for ure comment..
BalasHapuswell. my topic sentence is general and talks about friends and characteristics. But in my paragraph, I write sentence which help topic sentence is more specific. I wrote "And I want to describe one of them". I think like that mom..
:-)
Correct me if I wrong again ya mom..